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Pain Box or Hand Massager?

Thursday June 27, 2019. 08:30 PM , from BoingBoing
Suggested marketing copy for the Breo iPalm520s Electric Acupressure Hand Palm Massager:
'Put your right hand in the box,' she said.
Fear shot through Paul. He started to back away, but the old woman said: 'Is this how you obey your mother?'
He looked up into bird-bright eyes.
Slowly, feeling the compulsions and unable to inhibit them, Paul put his hand into the box. He felt first a sense of cold as the blackness closed around his hand, then slick metal against his fingers and a prickling as though his hand were asleep.
A predatory look filled the old woman's features. She lifted her right hand away from the box and poised the hand close to the side of Paul's neck. He saw a glint of metal there and started to turn toward it.
'Stop!' she snapped.
Using the Voice again! He swung his attention back to her face.
'I hold at your neck the gom jabbar,' she said. 'The gom jabbar, the high-handed enemy. It's a needle with a drop of poison on its tip. Ah-ah! Don't pull away or you'll feel that poison.'...
He felt increased tingling in his hand, pressed his lips tightly together. How could this be a test? he wondered. The tingling became an itch... The itch became the faintest burning... It mounted slowly: heat upon heat upon heat.... The burning! The burning! He thought he could feel skin curling black on that agonized hand, the flesh crisping and dropping away until only charred bones remained.
Actually, the hand massager is very pleasant and does not create a hallucinatory sense of agony, but Dune fans will want this anyway. Use code 35ESD75N for a good discount!
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